I once used to think that people only regret the stuff they don't do, not the stuff they do, but I definitely regret some of the things I have done in the past.
Truthfully, I have had a good life. I've been very lucky. But if I was to go back in time, I'd visit my 18 year-old self just before going to Cambridge University and tell him a few things:
- Fight
- Learn to fight. Not physical fighting.
- Fight depression.
- Fight procrastination.
- Fight negativity.
- Fight your fears (still fear, but face those fears head on).
- And don't quit your Engineering course at Cambridge University!
- Fight tiredness.
- Fight your doubts (believe in yourself).
- Fight your impatience
- Opportunities
- Take opportunities and don't fear change. Nothing is permanent.
- Possessions
- Live a simple minimalist life. Free from the binds of material possessions.
- Possessions possess you
- A house possesses you. Yes, it is nice to have your own house, but it creates ties, ties you to somewhere, you cannot move until you've sold your house.
- Possessions in your house possess you further. If you move you need to take all your sh!t with you.
- And don't get attached to possessions (I am most certainly very attached to some of my possessions.) I'd recommend not buying possessions you will get attached to.
- Marriage
- Don't get married. Marriage is a legal trap. Much better to have a lifelong partner, with two people who trust each other and are comfortable with each other, a legal document is not necessary and can make things worse (like "are you only staying together because of the piece of paper ...")
- The Life of a Loner
- There is nothing wrong with being a loner. The world will make it seem like you are weird, but if you simply like your own company, you don't feel comforable being around other humans, then don't fear the life of a loner. People make many mistakes trying to fit in, thinking they need a wife/husband, and then it doesn't work out, because what they really needed was to be alone.
- Things you'll love (because you're like me and love being alone and away from it all)
- Glamping
- Self-guided walking holidays
- Social Media
- It's a trap, stay away (unless you can make money from it)
- Buy gold
- I have wasted my money on a lot of things in my life (see below) and wish I'd simply bought gold instead. If I'd not wasted so much money on these things, maybe I could retire now (at the age of 50) and get way from it all!
- Cars
- Porn
- Dolls
- Dakimakura
- Vacations that were boring
Mistakes I Made In My Life
A list of all the mistakes I made in my life (sometimes I think you can make a mistake but be lucky - I think my life has been quite lucky even though I've done many stupid things.)
*Not 100% sure on some of the dates
- Never talking to the girl that sat next to me in class at school, when we were alphabetically arranged.
- Not keeping in touch with the nice History girl at the Cambridge University interview day.
- Dropping out of Cambridge University (1994)
- Dropping out of Nottingham University (1995)
- Not taking that 1st IT Job Opportunity (1996)
- Buying the Peugeot 205 Gti Gentry (Slow) Edition (which I crashed)
- Dropping out of Exeter University (1997)
- Not dating the girl at the health authority
- Not making any future plan whilst at Southampton University (so I graduated with a 2.1 BSc in Maths and ended up working in a call centre)
- Getting involved with a Thai Escort in 2004 and losing over £100k (was great life experience though)
- Getting involved with another Thai lady in 2009 and getting married to her in 2020
- Going to Thailand way too many times and doing pretty much the same thing every time
- Buying loads of sportscars and keeping them less than a year
- Buying loads of dakimakuras (over 100) and effectively binning them
- Buying loads of love dolls
- Being too materialistic and having way too many possessions and generating way too much waste
- Not discovering glamping until I was 50 and then realizing I'd been holidaying wrong all my life up to then - glamping in a private place, self-guided walking/trekking are the right holidays for me.
- Not learning to fight (see above) until I was 50
- Bining stuff instead of selling it (or giving it away) because I was too impatient (I needed to learn patience)
- Staying in the same job too long and getting complacent (yes, I've been in the same role since 2013 and I have allowed myself to be assigned to bullsh!t jobs ... I should have found a more interesting role ... life is what you make of it ,,, I should have made more of my life and opportunities ... I am not a victim ... and I have no labels, nothing is wrong with me ... no excuses for my mediocrity ... but I'm only 50 😉)