50 year old dude here, with some advice:
Never get involved with someone unless you are on an even footing!
I've had this Thai girlfriend/wife since 2009. She does nothing for me. I've given her money every month for years, she gets a nice free holiday when I go to Thailand, I've helped her out (with more money) when she has had crisises (there have been a few). But if I even question the status quo, it makes me feel bad, which is insane, because she is the one who has done all the taking. I've been the giver, which is meant to be good right!? Isn't giving meant to make you feel good!?
You will give them everything, but still feel bad if you question the relationship. Still feel guilty if you even contemplate turning off the money taps. DON'T FEEL ANY GUILT - YOU'RE NOT THE TAKER, THEY ARE!
It is wrong to judge people. Their lives are a total unknown to yours. But the feeling of unfairness in my relationship has hit me so hard now I'm 50 (and I realise the clock is ticking). This is why the recommendation for a successful relationship, is always that:
For a relationship to be a success you need to be equals.
Otherwise the uneveness of things will cause big problems.
That doesn't mean you both need to earn the same amount of money, just there must be balance in the relationship. It's not all about money. Maybe your lesser paid partner looks after the children / helps in other ways.
Anyway, that's all I had to say:
Never get involved with people where the relationship is very one sided. As the giver, you'll give everything but still feel bad if you question the relationship.
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| Never Get Involved (Unless You Absolutely Must) - Live Calm Like a Duck on Water! |
