I sometimes think I am the biggest fool in the world. I am sure that is not the case, the world is a very big place and there are many many fools. We are all foolish at some point. Still, in my world, I am a very big fool.
Q: Why do I think I am the biggest fool?
My main reason for thinking I am the biggest fool, is my shocking waste of time, money, resource and opportunity.
Examples:
- Dakimakuras:
- From say 2022 to late 2024, I went from 0 to over 100 dakimakuras. I also had 9 inner pillows. I am now down to 15 dakis (and will probably go down to 10) and just 1 inner pillow.
- Money wasted: say 100 dakimakura scrapped, inner pillows, infrastructure; easily: £10k
- Time wasted: a lot of time wasted buying dakis, deciding what to buy. managing my collection, time on a daki Discord channel, time cutting the dakis up into little pieces so I can put them in the trash; easily: 2500+ hours
- Love dolls:
- From 2016 to now (October 2025), I have destroyed 32 love dolls. I currently have 15 (a mixture of TPE, silicone and plush). No plans to reduce my collection any further.
- Money wasted: 32 love dolls, clothes, wigs, infrastructure: £50k
- Time wasted: time buying dolls, managing the collection, photography, doll forum time, destroying the dolls; easily: 5000+ hours
- Cars:
- From 2017, I seemed to go crazy for cars. I often had two cars, each of which I was changing every 6 months (or less). I kinda lost count of how many cars I've been through since 2017, well over 20 cars. I still have two cars now (one has been with me over 3 years, the other just over 4 months), but next car change will see me go down to 1 car, never to return to 2 ever again.
- Money wasted: over 20 sold, say roughly 5k lost per car, also upgrades, detailing, etcetera; easily: £100k
- Time wasted: Since a car mostly just sits out your house looking pretty, except when you enjoy it (go for a drive ... not time wasted), but there was all that time on Autotrader and Pistonheads, I would say: 2500+ hours
- Porn:
- I've definitely wasted a lot of time to porn. Very hard to quantify how much money and time I have lost to porn.
- Money wasted: £10k
- Time wasted: Say 5 hours every week for 30 years: 10000+ hours
- Rudderless thinking:
- Thinking endlessly and not ever coming to conclusions, not reaching decisions, not making sense of this life.
- Money wasted: 0 (definitely money has been lost due to procrastination, making wrong decisions, but the cost of thinking is nothing ... just time and energy)
- Time wasted: Say 1 hour every day for 35 years: 15000+ hours
- YouTube:
- Lots of time wasted!
- University:
- I dropped out of 3 and the 4th where I got my degree, turned out to be a waste of time because I didn't even use my degree for my work. Much potential wasted. I could have been a great engineer.
- Being a bum:
- I was essentially a bum until 30 when I got my first job with a proper contract.
- The ex-Thai girlfriend:
- A lot of time and money wasted. But she was good life experience.
I need to stop buying possessions - I have more than enough! Stop buying assets. Stop buying shit I don't need. Stop buying shit I'll only throw in the bin in a short time. The only truly valuable and non-wasteful thing I have bought in my life has been gold!
And stop wasting time on shit! Spend time on worthwhile experiences. Spend time on fitness. Spend time in study/learning. Spend time productively!